Pathlight: Journey to the Good Life – Getting It Right
Annie Wenger-Nabigon MSW, RSW, Author of Pathlight on OntarioNewsNorth.com
Originally from the U.S., Annie now enjoys retired life at Pic River First Nation. Annie Wenger-Nabigon, MSW, RSW has been a clinical social worker since 1979 working in mental health, family therapy, and addictions services. She is a doctoral candidate at Laurentian University in Sudbury, ON. Annie also works part-time as a consultant for LYNX, owned by her husband Herb Nabigon, MSW. Herb provides traditional Anishnabek teachings and healing workshops for both Native and non-Native organizations. Together he and Annie provide training and education to professionals on a wide range of topics blending mainstream and traditional approaches in healing. They also provide cultural safety and anti-racism training. Do you have questions re: mental health, living a good life, relationships, etc. ?Annie would love to hear them and may even include your questions in a future column (published by-monthly exclusively on OntarioNewsNorth.com) Send your comments or questions to Annie via email to Pathlight@OntarioNewsNorth.com
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There are a few times in life when we feel as if no matter what we do, we feel we just can’t “get it right”. Sure, it’s possible to say, “Well, who’s to say what is right?” and go on to ignore or justify the nagging feeling inside that something just isn’t right. It is true that judgements about right and wrong are subjective (meaning we can only know right and wrong from what we have learned in life) but it is equally true that there is a deep, inner place inside of each human being that sends a signal to us that we need to pay attention – something just doesn’t feel right.
Some people call this a “conscience”, or a “Higher Power”, or intuition. Regardless of how we name the feeling, we all have it. There seems to be something inside of human beings from birth that turns us in the direction of what is good for us and others, and away from things that hurt, just as in the plant world there is the turn toward the sun, the source of life’s essentials. Whatever this thing is inside of us, it has a “voice”, a quiet whisper, a gnawing anxiety, or just persistent ideas that keep occurring over and over again until we pay attention. It is part of the equipment we bring with us to this earth walk to help us navigate the social terrain. It lets us know when we need to make adjustments to our course.
We all know people who consistently ignore the better part of themselves and keep making the same mistakes repeatedly. They don’t seem to be able to learn from what other people can share with them, or even learn from their own past mistakes. I have often wondered what it is that must happen to a human being to create the numbness inside which makes them unable to learn better choices. How is it that people can see deep compassion modeled in the lives of caring people around them, and still behave in hurtful ways, especially to those who love them?
The news media and social media present examples everyday of people who have been cruel to animals, abusive to children, or violent in their own families. The stories of war and threats of war saturate our daily news reports. We hear about politicians who are corrupt, corporate leaders who are greedy, and clergy who are exploitive. We see what is happening with environmental destruction for the profit of stockholders, and the poisoning of water, air and land. All around us is the evidence of something being sadly out of balance in our world.
Something just doesn’t feel right about this. What is happening that we are missing the stories of wonderful people who thrive and are caring and generous with their families and communities? Where are the stories about the kindness of neighbors and strangers, the compassion and sacrifice of parents, teachers, nurses, social workers, doctors and others who work hard to bring healing and happiness to people’s lives? In order for the positive to balance out the negative we need to know the truth about all of it. Focusing only on one or the other will do nothing to round out the picture and give us an accurate view of our world.
Today I am so very thankful for the small, still voice inside that lets me know when something is out of balance. It calls me to think, to consider and look at things from as many angles as possible. Sure, sometimes I’m going to focus only on one aspect and it may be the negative side, but when I really let myself learn and grow I’m going to consider that there are other parts of the picture I’m ignoring for whatever reason.
It is that little feeling inside of me that helps to guide me to making choices that are not only good for me, but for my community. It helps me make tough choices and practice tough love. It pushes me on to work a little harder at the compassion. When I am at my finest and best I can: “get it right”. When I’m not at my finest and best I can make a mistake and move on, try to fix what I can, and forgive myself when I can’t. Each day I get a fresh chance to start over and work to make the day the best one possible – and it’s ok to ask for help. “Getting it right” is not a solo activity – it takes a whole village to raise a human being.
Let’s try to see what kind of great stories of positive action we can find in the world around us to balance out the rest of the shadows. Let’s try to see how we can improve ourselves, be better socialized, take other’s feelings into consideration when we make our moves, and spread some light around. “Getting it right” benefits everyone, and costs no one. It raises us all a little bit higher.
Annie Wenger-Nabigon, MSW, RSW
Pathlight@OntarioNewsNorth.com
ANNIE RECOMMENDS:
- The Hollow Tree by Herb Nabigon
- EldersTeachings.blogspot.com
- Pathlight: Journey to a Good Life archives
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*Health themed columns found on OntarioNewsNorth.com provide general information about medical conditions and treatments. The information is not advice, and should not be treated as such.
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